Heather

While I love classic Johnny Depp/Tim Burton collaborations (i.e. Edward Scissorhands), I haven’t liked most of the newer stuff (post 2000). That’s why I didn’t see Dark Shadows when it came out… I still hadn’t forgiven them for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

10 years (and a very persistent Netflix recommendation) later, I decided to give them another chance. I’m so glad I did, because I loved this movie. Granted, it was no cinematic masterpiece, but I was thoroughly entertained. It hit my Burton/Depp sweet spot – dark, brooding, and self-aware, underscored with just the right amount of campy humor. I also loved the soundtrack and Alice Cooper cameo – the latter in particular was a nice surprise.

My only complaint? I wish Johnny Depp had shown more emotional depth, though that has more to do with him as an actor than this particular movie. He’s lost a lot of softness/sensitivity over the years, which used to be my favorite thing about his performances.

That said, I did like his character. His chemistry with Michelle Pfeiffer was particularly good.

MY RATING: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Without question, the best part of this movie was Phylicia Rashad as the detective. That alone made it worth watching.

Other than that, it was decent as far as “made-for-TV” thrillers go. While it was predictable at times and definitely had its cheesy moments, I loved the 90s nostalgia. Keri Russel was gorgeous, and she played her role really well. The other characters (aside from Phylicia Rashad) did an okay job, but were fairly forgettable.

Overall? Not a bad movie. Not a great one, but not bad either.

MY RATING: ⭐⭐⭐

At the time this movie came out (2000), I was obsessed with romantic comedies. This is one of the few I didn’t see, mainly because I’d heard so many bad things by the time it came out on DVD. More recently, it was covered on a movie podcast I follow, both of the hosts concluding that a.) it doesn’t hold up, and b.) it’s genuinely awful.

To be fair, there’s a lot to dislike about it. Some of the female stereotypes are obnoxious, and Mel Gibson’s character is intolerable for at least half of the movie. It’s also way too long, and the music/score is horrible. Seriously, I hate that frenetic, jazzy New York shit, and I can’t stand Frank Sinatra.

Other than that? The movie wasn’t that bad. The characters/relationships are more endearing toward the end, and there were moments that were legitimately funny. Granted, I don’t think I’ll ever watch it again, but as far as mediocre late 90s/early 2000s romantic comedies go? I can think of worse ones.

MY RATING: ⭐⭐

I was obsessed with Lifetime movies in the 90s/early 00s, but I haven’t watched one since I got rid of cable about a decade ago. Damn, I’d forgotten how much I love them. The drama! The suspense! The slight edge of cheesiness that is always present, no matter how much their production values have improved over the years.

This movie in particular? Fucking fantastic. Yeah, the plot might’ve been predictable, but you know what? Lifetime movies aren’t about plot twists. They’re all about satisfaction, which is particularly true when it comes to my favorite trope. Crazy, obsessive dude targets hapless victim? There’s nothing I love more than seeing that guy get kicked in the proverbial nuts.

Obviously, I need to watch more Lifetime movies. Judge me if you want, but I find them way more entertaining than the average Oscar-winning film.

MY RATING: ⭐⭐⭐⭐